i found you a nicely apt description of what the fucking friendzone is
hurr durr men only ever want to fuck they don’t have feelings that get hurt occasionally
"you should be fine with my friendship even though you wanted to be romantically involved and I don’t care that you can’t be around me anymore"
not addressing whether women actually say they do want “nice guys”
"I can read your mind and know what you actually want"
I’ve stopped talking to girls if they’ve turned me down or broken up with me, not because I no longer see the value in being “nice” because I’m not getting paid for it in sex, but because it is painful to be around them. Being friends with a girl who you feel that way about is a punishment, and less than a consolation prize.
Perhaps I was guilty of romance-zoning. Sorry, but I only like you as a love interest. You might want a platonic friendship from me, and feel entitled to it, but I just don’t see you in that way. Does that offend you? Does it anger you that you’re not getting what you want? Are you no longer acting so friendly?
If somebody is in love with you, and you only like them as a friend, you aren’t entitled to their continued company (and for them to continue displaying the same high level of affection and care towards you, which you take advantage of), any more than they are entitled to your love in return. You don’t owe them a relationship, but they don’t owe you a friendship. It looks to me that you’re the one getting irrationally upset over that, and you’re not even the one who has their heart on the line.
Finally, human emotions aren’t reasonable, and we can’t expect them to be. You might not understand that a guy no longer wants to talk to you after you turned him down, because you were a good friend to him (as well as the object of his love) and should have at least earnt a continued friendship, but then you’re the one operating on the “friendship coins” rewards system.
Nobody is obliged to be your anything. The men walking away, not wanting to settle for friends if they still have feelings there, understand that. The women running after them, shouting, do not.
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